Colton Underwood is opening up about the lengths he went to in order to protect his secret before publicly coming out as gay.
The former Bachelor star recently reflected on his experiences while discussing life in the closet and the fear that accompanied it.
Underwood revealed that he only pursued encounters with married men because he believed they had as much, or more, to lose if his sexuality became public.
Looking back, he acknowledged that the mindset was unhealthy.
However, he explained that the decisions were driven by fear and a desire to maintain control over information about his personal life.
At the time, Underwood was pursuing a football career and struggling with questions about his identity.
He has spoken openly in recent years about the pressure he felt to conform to expectations from family, faith and society.
Those pressures followed him into reality television.
Underwood became a household name after appearing on The Bachelorette and later starring as the lead on The Bachelor in 2019.
During that period, much of the public conversation focused on his status as the franchise’s so-called “Virgin Bachelor.”
Underwood now says he disliked how central that storyline became.
He has explained that the attention created additional anxiety because it encouraged scrutiny of a part of his life that he was desperately trying to keep hidden.
For years, he hoped that following a more traditional path would somehow resolve the conflict he felt internally.
Instead, the struggle intensified.
In 2021, Underwood publicly came out as gay during a television interview that generated widespread media attention.
The announcement marked a major turning point in his life and career.
Since then, he has spoken frequently about mental health, self-acceptance and the challenges of coming out later in life.
His story has not been without controversy.
Many LGBTQ+ people have expressed mixed feelings about aspects of his past and the way his coming-out journey unfolded in public.
At the same time, others have connected with his descriptions of fear, shame and the pressure to hide one’s identity.
Today, Underwood is married to political strategist Jordan C. Brown.
The couple welcomed their son, Bishop, through surrogacy in 2024.
His latest comments provide another look at the complicated reality that existed behind the public image millions of viewers saw on television.
For Underwood, they also serve as a reminder of how profoundly fear can shape a person’s choices before they are ready to live openly.
📷 IG: @coltonunderwood
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